Invaded My Heart
by SarahShalomDavid
Summary: Jen is left alone in the darkness whilst the man she loves is with another woman. Her eyes fail to show the happiness or love that she once felt and now her eyes simply cry the heartache that she feels, whilst her hand gives her body alcohol to numb pain
1. Coldness of the Lost Love

Jenny begins to write poetry describing how she truly feels about Jethro......

**Disclaimer: **I dont own anything................((and the poem belongs to Strawberry Dortch))

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**She sits alone in her study, in a big, dark and lonely house. She misses the man she loves. She used to have him, but she left him, alone in a hotel in Paris, shattering her heart and breaking his. She never realised how much he meant to her, until she left that night. How much pain and misery she would have to endure. She loves him, but he will never know. One night she sits, yet again alone with a Bourban in one hand and a pen in another, she sits and tells her story. She writes of happy times in Paris with her soulmate, she writes of sad times without him and she writes of her desperation to be with the one man she wants the most, Jethro Gibbs. He was her first love, and if she were honest with herself, the only man shes ever truly loved, he was her soulmate and she had destroyed any hopes of happiness, because without him, she could never truly be happy. Tonight is not much different from any other night, shes alone and he is with her. He is with Colonel Mann. She can't understand this, she doesn't see what he sees in her, shes not even a redhead, shes blonde! Today she was stood on the balcony watching her agents at work, but more importantly she was watching her soulmate, trying to find a way of telling him, she was sorry and that she still loved him. She didn't see the point of crying over him anymore, it was a waste of time, but more importantly her tears could not turn back time. If it did she would never have left him, because she still loves him. She writes poetry now, the good, the bad, her life. Its all written in black and white, because she has no one to talk to, she hasnt anyone to confide in, and more importantly, she doesnt have Jethro, so she writes in front of her fireplace, alone in the dark, with nothing but a bottle of bourban for company.....**

_"You invaded my heart_

_Took my pride and put it to the side_

_You left my silhouette standing against the wall_

_Leaving all eyes on me because you left me_

_Loving you became a hobby_

_Something so familiar and easy to do_

_Now its more like an addiction_

_I can't seem to rid of_

_I want to leave you alone 'cause your heart isnt mine anymore_

_But Im missing you like crazy (body and soul)_

_Trying to shake myself and make myself_

_And gather anough strength to put you behind me_

_I'm constantly reminded that you were my first love_

_My intentions are slightly different_

_From the way they were in the beginning_

_Now my intentions are to let my first love go_

_(Something he has already done to me)_

_My dreams are now faded"_


	2. Warmth of the Firelight

Jethro didn't know what was wrong with Jen, he was worried about her. He had watched as she drowned her sorrows in gallons of Bourbon and salty tears that she thought her ex-lover couldn't see. It was killing him inside to see her in such a state. He knew it had something to do with his relationship with Hollis, because her drinking had got even worse when he openly admitted to her that he was seeing the blonde woman. Since them seperating in Paris years back, the red headed woman had not been the same. He noticed a huge diffference in her since they split up.

She didn't smile as much.

She didn't laugh as much.

He never saw the true happiness in her eyes that he had been used to seeing.

He never saw the peace within her body language.

He sighed to himself as he ran his hand through his grey hair, years had passed since he had last seen Jenifer Cassandra Shepard truly happy. Years had passed, and not a single one of them he coule remember himself or the female director smiling for real. Many months had passed and not once did he recall one true sound of laughter from his ex-partner or himself.

Every second that passed he had wished that she never left, every minute that went by he prayed that he could have just one more chance, every hour that dragged by his weary features reminded him that he hadn't been good enough for her, that he never would be and that he did nothing to stop the woman he loved from leaving his side. Every day that stumbled past was another day that failed to make him happy, and then as the years flew past he learnt to pretend not to miss her.

He missed her.

It was then that he looked up at the big house in front of him, darkness filled every window and seeped into his heart as the rain began to fall upon his tired head he realised something very important.

He was still in love with her.

He just had one problem, he didn't believe she could ever love him back again.

She walked out for a reason. Was she ever in love with him?

He cursed himself for such a thought, and smiled as he recalled the love and happiness within her eyes when she said yes to their engagement.

He walked up to the house, wondering where she could be and used the key that he had cut himself. Telling himself that he had to check on her. He had to check on the woman he loves. Loves? Yes that's right, he loves her. Always has done. Always will do. That beautiful red headed director owned his heart and soul.

The soft click of the door opening sounded through the dark hallway, echoing like a lonely beat of a heart.

He frowned, there was no main lights on in the house that he could see, then he noticed a soft, warm glow billowing like smoke from beneath the door of her study. It used to be her father's favorite place to be, she had told him that once when he first found her in there. He knew that she loved the fire. It was the calmness and relaxation it gave her that she loved so much. The warmth too was a favorite of hers, she loved to curl up in front of the fire in Paris with him just holding each other as the moon light flooded in through the window. He remembered holding her in his arms, feeling her breath as she slept and protectively shielding her from the world outside. He loved her so much. Still does too.

Softly walking up to the mahogany study door, he was silent in his steps before his hand gently made contact with the wood of the door and gave it a slight nudge. As the door gradually opened it revealled a warmly painted room, which was made even warmer with the crackling fire to the right of the door. He could see perfectly as the light reflected, the empty bourbon bottle, the glass with only a little in the bottom of it and the hand hanging from the chair. It was a green leather chair and the occupant was clearly dressed for bed. Visible was her silk green dressing gown, Jethro smiled remembering buying it for her back in Paris along with the matching nightdress and underwear. He always loved her in green, he told her at every chance he had gotten that she was beautiful and that the gree brought out her eyes.

He moved closer to her and noticed that she was asleep from her soft breathing pattern along with the fact she hadn't realised he was here yet. He knelt on front of her studying her beautiful features, even in sleep she wasn't as relaxed as Paris, she looked so broken hearted, with salty tear tracks streaming down her pale cheeks, and her mascara running black down her cheeks, as though highlighting her lonely tears.

He wished that he could take away her pain, or even better go back to Paris and beg her to stay. To stay for the both of their happiness. To stay because he loves her and always will.

Leroy gently pried the piece of paper from beneath right hand, and began to read it. As he read it tears fell from his crystal blue eyes, she still loved him. There was still a chance of happiness for both of them.

He put the piece of paper into the fire, watching it burn. Now was the hard part; he wanted to burn those feelings from the woman he loves. He wanted her to be happy again, he wanted her to know that he loved and will always love her.

Turning gently on his heel, once more he studied the beautiful features of the woman before him. He knew that she was not as relaxed as she had once been. He leant forward gradually and softly pressed his rough lips to her soft lips.

She opened her eyes suddenly and seeing him she began to cry, "I have to stop drinking if I am going to imagine you every time I do" she whispered painfully, she touched his cheek softly, "I love you Jethro" she said as fresh tears fell from her emerald eyes.

The caring and loving man smiled at her happily and covered her hand with his, "I want you to stop drinking Jen, but when you do I will still be here for you because I love you too" he said gently

Jen grinned, "You're real" she commented shocked and threw herself into his arms happily, "Oh, Jethro I love you so much. I'm sorry I ever left you Jethro. It was the worst mistake I could have ever made" she looked into his eyes, "I love you" she whispered softly like the breeze

Gibbs pulled her close to him and held her tightly to him, "I love you too Jen, I should have told you how much back then, then you wouldn't have even felt the need to leave, I love you Jen. Always have done and always will" he said holding her in his arms as he sat on the floor of her study on a soft rug.

Jenifer kissed him softly, then froze, "But what about Hollis?" she asked curious, the tears in her eyes were fresh

Leroy sighed, and ran his hand through her red curls, "We split up a while ago, and we wasn't really dating" he admitted

Jen frowned, "What do you mean?" she asked confused

Jethro's eyes sparkled with amusement, "It was just friends and it started out as we were pretending to date to stop that weirdo from Legal asking her out" he said softly, "I wouldn't date anyone else, How could I? When I love a beautiful red head that captured my heart long ago" he said romantically

The beautiful woman smiled brightly, "Oh I love you Jethro, I wish you had told me..." she said kissing him again and again

He smiled and held her close, undoing her necklace in order to take the emerald engagement ring from her neck and slide it onto her slender finger, "It's forever this time Jen, I'm never letting you go again" he said firmly

She smiled, it was a real smile, and there was love and happiness in the depths of her now sparkling green eyes, "Forever" she confirmed with a loving kiss to his lips as his callous hands held the woman close to him. So close that she could hear the heart that beat for her, and her only.


End file.
